Reminiscing About Watergate

----- Original Message -----

Nixon is supposedly dead. I still don't trust him.

----- Original Message -----

No he's dead, Agnew emailed me! As a matter of fact Neil danced on his grave!!!!!! Goof had no respect for the presidency, he wore those ugly white shoes....

----- Original Message -----

You mean Agnew is still alive? If my first name was Spiro I'd kill myself....or someone. That parsimonious pissant. How stupid are you when you get caught stealing money? If Tricky Dick had those "plumbers" steal the petty cash box, which is all the Demos had at that time, he would have gotten away with it all.

I never bought the idea he was stealing the McGovern game plan. They didn't have one except punt on first down. My God, the man didn't even carry his home state. If you can't steal the votes at home, you don't deserve to be President. In fact, you'd be dangerous. The Russians, formerly the USSRers, would have picked us clean.

One thing about the Trickster, he was smart until, you know, Watergate.(I think Agnew got him drunk and got him to sign the papers okaying it).I remember his speech in China, "Let me make this perfectly clear. You are not the Red Chinese. You're obviously the Yellow Chinese."

----- Original Message -----

Actually Spiro died. Nixon was insane though to think he had to spy and play dirty tricks on McGovern to win a close one. Personally I think the Dems snookered him for 1976. Anyway you have the quote all wrong. What he said, and it was later mysteriously erased from the audio tape, was " I'm very surprised you Chinks are so yellow, Spiro told me you were reds. I always knew he was a crook but color blind and stupid as well, my God"!!!

----- Original Message -----

Nixon's plan for 1972 was to become only the second person elected unanimously by the Electroral College. He had the 49 states and found out he would have won in Massachusetts if Ted Kennedy hadn't voted1,482,954 times.

"That #%%$###!! I was told he had his hand in a sling because he made a move on a broad who wasn't a real broad !!!"

Then he was told he still wouldn't have gotten all the Electoral votes because Washington, D.C. would never have voted for him anyway. Nixon was stunned to hear that. He didn't know Washington, D.C. had any Electoral votes.

"Who thought that one up!! Me??!! I said let's push civil rights in the South!!! For every colored voter the Democrats get, we get two white voters!! There aren't any white voters in Washington, D.C.!!! Don’t you people ever listen to me??!!"

----- Original Message -----

My question is just where in the HELL is this personal conversation going?, and why is it going?

G. Gordon Liddy

----- Original Message -----

Want to know that? Get us on your show. We will bring you in to this eventually. After all, you got caught, you idiot.

----- Original Message -----

Gordon: shh, it's me, over here!

-Howard Hunt

----- Original Message -----

Howie, remember when I used a lighter to scorch my forearm to show how unyielding I was and could not be tortured into revealing information. I didn't even shed a tear. I had to strain hard to do that and let out a colossal fart and then crapped in my pants. When the fart got to the lighter (gas rises you know) it detonated, sending me flying out the door. I wasn't injured at all. The explosion sent ccrap flying everywhere. Good Lord, those people were perturbed, the wussy, sissified cowards.

----- Original Message -----

Yes I remember telling Dean to tell the house committee that he remembered the incident as well. He was to tell them that this is what he meant when he said you flew by the seat of your pants. I tried to talk him into saying this is how Nixon got crazy and started praying to all those pictures. He said his wife Maureen wouldn't hear of it. He told me once he taped an "encounter" with her.

I told him Ms.Woods must have erased 10-15 minutes of it since all I heard was silence. He said no, that she never made any noise!

Howie in Hiding

----- Original Message -----

Well, you dummy, of course she didn't make any noise. She didn't know there was anything happening.(You learned some fancy way to say that. You must be hiding in a library.) You're still the craphead who ratted us out to Sirica. I should have let the brothers use you for a pillow squaw.

-G. Gordon Liddy-