"This Isn't Kansas Anymore, Toto"

Dorothy told Toto that “this isn’t Kansas anymore”. What gave it away, Dorothy? The trees maybe? You never saw a real one. Not live. Not in Kansas. As for Toto, as the Farside said, all he understood was Toto. He didn’t know, or care, that he wasn’t in Kansas anymore. He didn’t know he was in Kansas in the first place.

They ran across the Strawman. He was lying in the middle of the road and Dorothy thought he was a clump of weeds. Toto peed on him.

“Hey! Your dog pissed on me!”, the Strawman yelled.

“Oh, I’m awfully sorry, sir. We didn’t know you were a person. We thought you were a clump of weeds. Why are you made of straw?”, Dorothy asked.

“Huh? What else- uh, you- I don’t know. I just am, that’s all. Nothing wrong with it as long as I don’t get too close to a fire or a dog that can’t hold himself”, he answered while glaring at Toto. Toto couldn’t have cared less. He didn’t understand any of it.

Later on they came across the Tinman. Toto lifted his leg to the Tinman too.

“Hey, you mongrel! You want me to rust away? Hey, you little brat, can’t you control that dog”, he asked.

“Oh, I’m awfully sorry, sir. Gee, you’re made of metal”, Dorothy said.

“You’re a bright one. Yea, I’m made of tin. Couldn’t be made of gold or silver. Of course, if I was, someone would melt me down. I have to steer clear of fires and dogs that can’t hold themselves”, he responded while glaring at Toto. Toto couldn’t have cared less. He didn’t understand any of it.

Then came the Cowardly Lion. He scared Toto so badly that Toto peed on the Cowardly Lion’s legs, all of them. Now Toto wished he was in Kansas again. Wherever that was.

“Hey, your dog took a whiz on my legs! All of them! Oh, I’m sorry I yelled at you. Your dog doesn’t bite, does he?”, the Cowardly Lion asked Dorothy.

“Goodness, no. He never bit any-”

Until now. Toto didn’t understand any of it but he knew a cat when he saw one.