Captain Kirk, formerly Admiral Kirk, gazed out at space. He was, as a matter of fact, a little spaced out himself. 35 years inside a ship does that to you, he thought. 35 years of listening to logic from Spock didn’t help. Scottie still couldn’t be understood. One more dumb, lame joke from McCoy might send Kirk over the edge. Comes right down to it, Uhura was looking a bit droopy. Still a babe though.

“Captain Kirk”, Spock said, “we are being probed by another ship”.

“Identify!!”.

“It’s the Enterprise, sir”, Spock told him.

“We’re the Enterprise!! I know that. Who’s probing us?”, Kirk asked with some trace of disgust in his voice.

“Sir, it’s the Enterprise”.

“Spock, you’re Mister Logic and all that crap. Does this sound logical to you?”

“No, it doesn’t. If you’ll excuse me, Captain, I’m going to my quarters and do a Vulcan Cleanout. My human side must be gaining. I don’t want to end up like you”.

“Spock”, McCoy yelled out, “if you need a cleanout, eat chili and wait a minute.”

“Doctor McCoy, you’re feeble attempt at humor is one of the reasons I’m glad not to be a human”, Spock told him.

“Oh, I don’t know. That was one of his better efforts”, Kirk said.

“Jim, sometimes I think Spock is full of-”

“Well, not after this Vulcan Cleanout he won’t be”, Kirk said with a laugh.

“Sir, we’re being hailed on all frequencies”, Uhura informed the Captain.

“Put it on the screen”, Kirk told her.

“This is the Federation ship Enterprise. Who are you and what do you want?”, Kirk said to the screen.

“This is the Federation ship Enterprise. I am Captain Hathaway. I’m lost in space and need help”.

“That was an early Earth television show starring Guy Williams. It was a stupid show. Bad acting and -”, Spock informed the Captain.

“I thought you left”, Kirk said in surprise.

“Yes, you did. I didn’t. If I had of, I couldn’t have said what I did. That's not logical. My saying it because I was still here is logical.”

“Captain, I know we’re lost”, Hathaway told Kirk. “I wonder why you’re not lost with that guy on you staff. I’d have to jettison him...or go crazy”.

“Yes, I know the feeling. I take it you’re from the future?”

“Captain. Logic proves that. We know the past; we’re the present. Therefore, this Enterprise must be from the future”, Spock said.

“Kirk to Engineering. Mr. Scott, prepare to beam Spock”.

“Aye, Captain. Canna I ask where to?”, Scott asked.

“Yes, anyplace that’s empty”.

“Aye, I canna do that easily”.

“Sir, if I may say so, that’s illogical. If I am sent to a place that’s empty, my very presence would change that. Change that and you change everything. Are you sure you want to do that?”

“Hmm, you have a point. Scottie, belay my last order. Send Spock to the future Enterprise”.

“Aye, Captain, I canna do that”.

Hathaway was heard screaming, “Shields up. Maximum power. Get us out of here!!!”.