I sent my state income tax from in April 17th. No real reason other than I’m, by nature, a procrastinator. I didn’t owe any money. I had a refund due. I wasn’t planning to use the money for any particular thing so I wasn’t in any hurry. The amount I was getting back was about $1200. I figured it would be late July before I got it.

The end of July comes and no check. On August 8th, I called about it. I was told that my return had been received but not processed yet. Okay. Now it’s September 12th and still no return. Time to see what’s what. I called and got a human being on the line. That should have made things easier. Foolish me.

"Yes, sir, we did receive your return. I’m looking at the computer and it shows you owe $611. It shows that no withholdings on your income."

"Uh, I’m looking at my return and it shows $1880 in withholding. So does my W-2. Umm, doesn’t it strike you as strange that my employer didn’t withhold any money? Seems to me that would jump right out at you", I said.

"Actually, sir, I’m not looking at your return or your W-2. I’m looking at the information keyed in."

"Well. it’s incorrect. Let me ask you a question. According to what your looking at, I owe you $611 in taxes. Right?"

"Yes, sir, that’s what it’s showing."

"Let me ask another question. When were you planning to try and collect what appears as taxes owed? I don’t believe you were going to ignore it, though you seem to be doing just that."

"Sir, let me transfer you to a revenue supervisor."

Great! Now I get to talk to someone who knows what they're talking about and can get something done. Foolish me, again.

"Yes, sir, how can I help you?", the voice said.

"Yea, my name is-"

"Yes, sir, I have all your information right in front of me".

Then why ask?

"Well, I guess what I want to know is when I'm going to get my money."

"What I'm looking at shows that no withholding was taken out-"

"Uh, excuse me. I've already been there with the other person. I had 1800 taken out and owe 600. leaving you owing me 1200 dollars. That pretty much sums it up."

"Yes, sir, but the problem is that the withholding was never keyed in and, therefore, doesn’t show."

"Well, I’m looking at a copy of my return and it shows. I also have a copy of my W-2’s and they show money taken out. How could you not see that if my copy is showing it?", I asked.

"As I said, sir, it wasn’t keyed in. I have a notation on your file. I have 12 of these altogether."

"A notation?"

"Yes, sir. It says that the paper copy cannot be found and the return cannot be processed any further. I placed that on your file August 1st".

"August 1st? I called on August 8th to see what was what. I was told the return was being processed. What do you mean can’t be found?"

"It’s lost. No, not really lost. It’s somewhere in this building but no one knows where."

"Well, Christ lady! When were you going to notify me?"

"I don’t have a contact number for you."

"You have my address!"

"Yes, sir, I do. But, think of this, sir. How would you feel if you got your mail and received a letter from the tax bureau saying that we lost your return and need you to send a copy of your return to us?"

"Huh? How do you think I felt going to my mailbox everyday and not seeing a check from you? What were you planning to do?"

"Wait until you contacted us, as you have today."

"Okay, fine, whatever. What do I have to do?"

"I need to have a copy of the return, your W-2 and any 1099's you sent in."

"Fine. I’ll mail them to you. I’ll scan the forms into-"

"You have a scanner? Then you can just fax them to me and I’ll put a priority on your return."

"Fax? I don’t have a fax. Most people don’t, you know."

"Actually, most people do. You can e-mail them to me too."

"Okay, I’ll do that. How do I keep this from happening next year?"

"Pray we hire smarter typists."