Billy was the senior member of the Horse Followup Patrol. Their job was too follow up on complaints that the carriage horses were discharging waste onto the street. Despite the embarrassment when people laughed at him when he described his job, Billy was a proud member. He got paid decently and wore a spiffy uniform. He knew that as long as biology didn't change he would always have a job. The genetic people scared him a little bit.

There's a call now. Billy put on his protective gear carefully. It was rubber boots, rubber gloves and a garbage bag with a hole in it for his head. He grabbed the equipment bag and jumped on his moped. His equipment bag contained all the essential for the job. He had a large, very large, pooper-scooper, fire extinguisher containing a mixture of water, soap and disinfectant.

He had powdered odor neutralizer. He had a broom and a mop. He had sponges. He looked like a mobile housecleaning service. He, of course, was a mobile horse cleaning service guy, or something like that. He ran all the red lights. He wasn't allowed too, he just did. He didn't care about his driver's license. The state had lifted that years ago.

When he arrived at the scene of the accident, he was horrified. Tourists were standing around holding their noses. One was using a paper towel to clean something off her shorts. Billy didn't have time for that. There, right in the middle of the street, was the largest pile of, uh, waste Billy had ever seen. It was runny. Danged horse peed on top of it.

Then, according to the carriage driver, the other horse, playing follow the leader, did the same thing. That's when the lady got splashed.

"You best be quick like. There's another carriage due along shortly. Then you'll really have a mess on your hands", the carriage driver informed Billy.

"I wear gloves. I practice safe scooping".

Billy proceeded to start the waste disposal procedure. He drew a crowd. some people will watch anything, he supposed. They watched but none of them got too close. Billy noticed that too. Some of them offered helpful hints.

"Maam, if you don't mind, I'm a professional", Billy responded with a straight face.

Billy got it all removed and got on his moped to return to the stables. He got a nice round of applause and one guy gave him a tip.

Billy was writing his report when the cellphone rang.

"Hey, this Billy? Yea, Okay. What we got here is a horse that, umm, let's say he's not constipated".