Tully was a hard drinking man. He could really put it away. His friends and neighbors were awed by the amount of whiskey he could drink. He was, according to his wife, an alcoholic. According to his mother he was, “a drunk just like his dad”. One thing , for sure, was that he had killed a lot of brain cells in his life.

Tully went to Dr. Smith for his annual checkup. They did all the regular things. They took blood causing Tully to pass out. They did the gloved finger test which caused Tully to wonder. They sent all the various fluids to the lab.

“Mr. Tully, the test results show that you have an enlarged liver”, Dr. Smith told him.

“Well, Doc, I guess that’s good. See, I drink a lot. A lot”, Tully said.

“No, no, Mr. Tully. You have an enlarged liver because of the drinking”.

“Well, then it still works out the same then, don’t it”.

“No. No, it doesn’t. Having an enlarged liver is never a good thing. Unless you take steps now you aren’t going to live a normal life span. You are going to have to stop drinking”.

“Huh? If I have big liver I should be able to drink a lot. I wouldn’t need a big liver if I didn’t drink. Besides, what if I do quit drinking and a week later get run over by a train? What did not drinking gain me then?”.

Dr. Smith could see he was losing this. He decided to play Tully’s pride. This is the way Dr. Smith convinced Tully to give up the booze.

“Hmm. Mr. Tully, I am going to try to make you understand this. If you were sober you wouldn’t get run over by a train. You’d have to be drunk to be that stupid”.