Here in Charleston, South Carolina, we have a flooding problem. It's not like when the Mississippi overflows it's banks and certainly not like the Great Flood. Seeing it written like that makes it seem like we're a bunch of whiners. So be it.

The problem here is that the original Charles Towne, which is now downtown Charleston is below sea level. It's fun to go downtown and park along the Barrier, walk halfway across, look down 10 feet to the ocean and then turn around and be looking in the third story bedroom of a house. Never saw anything interesting but you never know. The city was also built on filled in marsh land. The ocean is on one side; two rivers form two sides; the Crosstown Expressway completes it. Way back when, it didn't matter about the rain. It rained, the streets got muddy and five minutes after the rain stopped the water was absorbed. Then they bricked, cemented and asphalted the streets. They built the expressway and the trouble started. The water had no place to go so the streets became rivers and downtown a lake. The expressway became a rushing river.

Driving it is a nightmare, at least for us. You don't actually drive the expressway unless you're in a truck. You float across it. The smart “drivers” become sailors. Your wheels become dual rudders. You can sail the expressway nicely unless a truck roars by you. Then one of three things happens. If you're quick you sail over and get right behind the truck and are now driving although you can't see where you're going. The second thing that might happen is the you sail right over the median and get turned around and headed back the other way. The third thing is that the current that rolls over you after the truck goes by turns you onto a side street.

The city dug a deep well with a large pump to alleviate the problem. That lasted for one rain. There's no pump powerful enough to pump that much water from the city to the ocean. All it does is make cross currents and ship- car wrecks. It's sort of like playing bumper cars except that it's your car getting banged around.

There is an alternative. You can drive out to higher ground an bypass the whole thing. It's a little farther to travel but no slower since you'd be driving instead of sailing. Nobody does it. Some because they're dumb and others because what's the fun in that?