Hit Real Sudden Like

Bubba and Earl were standing on the corner of Main and North Main when they saw him coming towards them.

“Shoot! Thah’s thet danged, crazy old coot, Wilbur. Man, he be crazah ‘n a dog with a piece a meat tied ta the top a his hahd”, Bubba said. He used to do that for sport until Billy Granger shot at him. Billy didn’t mind teasing dogs but he didn’t like Bubba teasing his dog. Fact is, he didn’t like Bubba much at all.

“Wahl, Ah reckons ya git hit by lightnin’ right smack en the hahd, ya gets a mite bit crazy”, Earl added.

Bubba was wondering how many times Earl must of been hit but he didn’t ask.

“Marnun, thar, Wibuh” ,Bubba said.

“Wah, iffen ya mix green an’ yeller, ya gits blue. Thet’s odd”, Wilbur responded.

“Ah guess it be thet, iffen ya thinks on it”, Earl told Wilbur.

“Wah would ya think on et any. Ah don’ nevah think on it, so why does you?”, Bubba asked.

“Gotta think on somethin’. Iffen ya don’, yer brain gonna rot out all togethah”, Wilbur told Bubba.

“Ya gits the same way iffen ya drinks too much too”, Earl mentioned.

“Ya can git thet way from workin’ on yer car in a closed up garage, iffen ya leaves et runnin, Ah mean. There be a whole lot a things what rot the brain out but Ah don’ think talkin’ ‘bout mixin’ colors togethah gonna stop any a et”, Bubba argued.

“Wahl, be thet as it may, iffen ya don’ think ahn somethin’, ya don’ even know wheah ya goin ahr why ya goin’ thar”, Wilbur said.

“Okay, Wibuh, guessn’ ya be raght ‘bout thet. Wheah is ya headed ta, anyways?”. Bubba asked.

“Don’ rightly know. Ah musta been goin’ someplace or Ah’d still be et home. Dang! Ah hates et when this happens ta me. Ah guess Ah go on back home ‘till Ah thinks a wheah Ah was a plannin’ a goin’”

“Wahl, this jus’ be an ideah, but Ah was a thinkin’ thet maybe iffen ya was ta mosey on down the street it maght hit ya real sudden like a whar ya was goin’”, Earl said.

Bubba was thinking that gettin hit real sudden like is what made Wilbur the way he is. Apparently, Wilbur had the same idea.

“Nah, Url, thank ya kindly, but Ah had enuff real sudden like hits ta las’ me the rest a mah life. Know whet Ah means?”, Wilbur said.

“Yea, reckon ya was out en one storm ta many as it were. One more hit ‘n ya maht need ya one a them thar burin’ fella’s”, Earl agreed.

“Yea, iffen they be anah thin’ left ta bury”, Bubba closed with.