The Big Ship

Bubba and Earl heard about the “Big Ship” from their buddy, Darryl. Darryl had taken Trixie to Charleston for their honeymoon and had seen the ship from the harbor. Darryl said, that while he hadn’t actually gone onboard, it was a “big un”. That got Earl thinking. He hadn’t ever been on a real ship. He had tried to join the Navy and, “see the world”, but they rejected him.

“Man, Chief, that was the stupidest guy I ever seen. He’s so stupid he ought ta go an’ join the Marines. Ain’t nobody too stupid for them”, one of the medics said.

“Yea, he was a real dummy”, the Chief agreed.

Earl didn’t join the Marines. He just went home happy he got a free lunch from the Navy. He always wanted to see a real Navy ship up close. He talked Bubba into going with him. They managed to find Charleston and , after a while, the harbor. They could see the ship.

“Thing is, Bubba, Ah wanna go on ‘er. Don’ rightly see how we gonna gets thar from heah”, Earl said.

“Don’ neither. Gotta be some ways a doin’ et. Folks go on ‘er all the time. They sure can’t ‘pect ya ta swim on out ta et. Maybe there be a bus go ta et”, Bubba said.

“Bubba, ain’t no bus goin’ to float on out thar. Why, Ah don’ think no bus’d git twenny feet afore et sunk”, Earl told him.

“Earl, Ah swear ya gittin’ dumber every day. A ‘course no bus be floatin’ us out thar. Ah meant, maybe thar be a bus take us ta where the ship be. Ah don’ think Ah’d wanna walk thet fer an’, ‘sides’, we don’ know how ta git thar”, Bubba answered.

Well, they found a way to Patriot’s Point and the USS Yorktown, a WWII aircraft carrier now being used as a museum and tourist trap.

“Golly gee, Bubba, thet be the bigges’ durn ship Ah ever seed”, Earl said.

“Well, golly gee raht back ta ya. Thet do be a big un. ‘Course, we ain’t nevah seen a real ship afore so thet might have a little ta do with et”, Bubba replied.

“No nevah mind thet, et still be a big un”.

“Yea, et be thet”.