The Secret Service agent finished pouring the coffee at this informal meeting of some of the top guns in the administration. As was customary, the President spoke first.

"Hey, how come we never have pork rinds at these things?"

The Secret Service agent, ever alert, said, "Sir, that was your father's favorite, not yours."

"Uh, yea. I keep mixing him and me up what with us having the same name and stuff."

While he was saying this he was nervously watching Dick Cheney.

Cheney, as the most influential VP in history, spoke very bluntly.

"Sir, this is lousy coffee."

Dubya decided to tell Cheney the truth.

"Uh, Dick, umm, buddy, that's not coffee. It's hot water with food coloring in it. You shouldn't be drinking coffee with that heart of yours."

Rumfeld snorted.

"What are you snorting about? You ordered an invasion of Iraq", Cheney said.

"You said it was a good idea. Don't try to fob this off on just me, Dickie", Rumsfeld replied.

"Say, guys, I thought only I could order an invasion", Dubya cried out.

"Well, actually, sir, as Secretary of Defense, I order an invasion, or attack, or whatnot. I mean, you can't just pick up the phone and tell some general to attack someone. There's a chain of command involved."

"But why? Why did you two do that?"

Rumsfeld said, "Because that's the way I am."

Cheney said, "I was having caffeine withdrawal."

Colin Powell was sitting there thinking, "I gotta get out a this place."