The newly sworn in President was visited by an Air Force Colonel named Smith.

“Good morning, Col. Smith.”

“My name’s not Smith. It’s the name I use”, Smith told him.

“What’s your real name?”

“Sir, that’s classified. You’re not cleared to know my name.”

“I’m the President.”

“Yes, sir, I know that. My own mother doesn’t know my name.”

Smith then told the President the real story about the Roswell crash. About the aliens. About what he was going to see there.

The security guards, half-man, half-wolf, half-gorilla patted the President down. A “routine procedure, sir” was how they put it. He met Dr. Chang, the Director of the Project. Chang was an odd looking guy. Nothing in particular, just odd looking. He told the President he would first show him the alien. It was what all the Presidents wanted to see and whined until they did.

“It looks like Elvis!”, the President exclaimed.

“Yes, the resemblance is remarkable. We once checked Mr. Presley out but he was born before the crash so he was ruled out. By them, not me.”

“What’s he preserved in, formaldehyde?”

“No. Great stuff, formaldehyde. Thing is, it makes you look like an old leather purse. No, we use Jello.”

“Jello? Jello?”, the President asked.

“Great stuff, Jello. Never eat it, though.”

“I hear music.”

“Yes sir, it soothes us. It’s all on CD.”

“Most stuff is.”

“We had CD’s for years before anyone else. We had to figure out how to get it patented first. Made a killing on it.”

“You mean the government gets royalties from this project?”

“Ha, ha, sir. You have a sense of humor. No, we do. We all own seaside homes, with houseboys. The government gets new weapons. Straight trade-off.”

“What’s the biggest concern you have here. I mean, God knows what you’ll discover”, the President asked.

Dr. Chang thought about that for a while. “Sir, our biggest concern is that the aliens will find out we have this ship and it’s crew. They might get pissed off about that. We worry about that a lot.”

“Thinking they might attack us and we don’t have the weapons to defeat them?”

“Huh? No. We worry they might demand a split of the money. Sir, we’re so leveraged, it would bankrupt us all.”