John was a clerk in a small drugstore, but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. The drugstore owner had had about sale he missed would be his last. Just then a man came in coughing and asked John for their best coughsyrup. Try as he might, John could not find the cough syrup. Remembering the owner's warning, John sold the man a box of Ex-Lax and instructed him to take the entire box all at once. The customer immediately consumed the entire box in the store and then walked outside and leaned against a lamppost.

    The drugstore owner had seenthe whole thing and came over to ask John what had transpired.

    "He wanted something for his cough but I couldn't find the cough syrup. I substituted Ex-Lax and told him to take it all at once."

    "Ex-Lax won't cure a cough!" the owner shouted angrily.

    "Sure it will," John said, pointing at the man leaning on the lamppost. "Look at him. He's afraid to cough."

    Birthin' babies

    In the back woods of a rural town, Mrs. Stewart went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing."

    Soon, a wee baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there Sir!" said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down... I think there's yet another wee one to come."

    Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered another little baby. "No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern, young man... It seems there's yet another one besides!" cried the doctor.

    The new father scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor. "Do ya think it's the light that's attractin' them?"

    Skeleton

    The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items. I sat the displayskeleton in the front of my car, his bony armacross the back of my seat. I hadn't considered the drive across town. At one traffic light, the stares of the peoplein the car beside me became obvious, and I looked across and explained, "I'm delivering him to my doctor's office."

    The other driver leaned out of his window. "I hate to tell you, lady," he said, "butI think it's too late!"