"Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the modish young lady.

"What's to be proud of?" asked the old man.

The young lady replied, "I noticed that when you sneeze, you put your hand in front of your mouth."

"Of course," explained Grandpa. "How else can I catch my teeth???"

Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"

Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

Incontinence Hotline...Can you hold, please?

Lysdexia: a peech imspediment we live to learn with...

If only women came with pull-down menus and on-line help.

43.3% of statistics are meaningless!

The difference between tax avoiding and evasion is 10 Years.

It said 'Insert disk #3', but only two will fit.

Originality is the art of concealing your sources.

Just fill out one simple form to win a Tax Audit!

Paper clips are the larval stage of coat hangers.