An old man limped into the doctor's office and said, "Doctor, my knee hurts so bad, I can hardly walk!"

The doctor slowly eyed him from head to toe, paused and then said, "Sir, how old are you?"

"I'm 98," the man announced proudly.

The doctor just sighed, and looked at him again. Finally he said, "Sir, I'm sorry. I mean, just look at you. You are almost one hundred years old, and you're complaining that your knee hurts? Well, what did you expect?"

The old man said, "Well, my other knee is 98 years old too, and it doesn't hurt!"

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operateon. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operatingtable because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians!Everything inside them is color-coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in, "You know, I like construction workers... those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed "You're allwrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart,no spine and the head and rear are interchangeable."